Some People Say That the Best Way to Improve Public Health

Lilie King
Written by Lilie

Scored a 7 twice in the writing test

October 4, 2021

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

This essay question is from Cambridge IELTS 9 Test 3 Writing Task 2.

Sample Essay

In many countries, public health is declining. While adding more sports facilities might improve sports participation, I believe that this alone would not make much difference to people’s health and that it is also necessary to make fast food more expensive.

Some think that building more sports facilities can lead to an increase in sports participation. Many people do not exercise regularly because there is nowhere in their neighborhood where they can participate in activities they enjoy. If, for example, more basketball courts were built in a neighborhood, basketball lovers who live there would play the sport more often. However, I and others think this would have little impact on people’s health if they don’t change their unhealthy diet.

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We think it is also important to increase the price of fast food. Many people over-consume it because it is cheap. For example, in the United States, a twenty-piece box of Chicken McNuggets costs only 5 dollars. If a  20 percent tax was implemented on fast food, many consumers probably wouldn’t order some at all, let alone overeat. Since over-consumption of fast food is a major culprit in causing obesity, a regulation like this could be extremely effective in terms of preventing health problems associated with being overweight, such as heart disease and diabetes.

In conclusion, even though increasing the number of sports facilities might encourage people to exercise more often, I think this alone does little to improve health. To achieve a better result, fast food should also be sold at a higher price. (255 Words)

Common Mistake

Don’t change “sports facilities” to “sports amenities”. They don’t mean exactly the same. For example, an aquatic center is a facility but not an amenity.

How to Use “Let Alone”

5 CommentsLeave A Comment

  1. Hi Lilie,
    Can you please review my writing sample for this topic:
    While building more sports facilities might encourage people to participate in sports activities, I strongly support this idea that this approach lonely would not make a difference to people’s health situation, and I believe that informing people about the advantages of being healthy are more effective.
    First of all, when sports facilities are more available for all walks of life as the result of adding more sports facilities, the number of people who are encouraged to have a daily exercise program might be increased. For example, by building a tennis club, the opportunity of doing sports activities will be given to those who are interested to this sport which may improve health situation among them. However, in my opinion, this would have little impact on public health because most people do not have enough knowledge about the benefits of healthy life style.
    On the other side, some others believe that when people have not been educated during their life about the merits and the ways of having a healthy lifestyle, the public health situation will not be boosted, even with building more and more sports facilities. Meaning that, most people are neglecting sports activities not because of lack of sports facilities, but because of their lack of information and knowledge about health. Therefore, in my opinion, making educational program about health context for people will be more effective on enhancing public health situation.
    In conclusion, although increasing the number of sports facilities might encourage people to have regular exercise program, in my point of view improving people’s knowledge about health will have more impacts on achieving better public health.

  2. Thanks, you share this helpful writing pattern.
    I would like some tips and trick you about paraphrasing the subject. I have already learned lots of things about paraphrasing and how to vary them, but I think it’s sufficient for that reason I assume, I need more new methods to improve my writing. so, especially paraphrasing is very crucial I thought. Could you help me provide all strategy?

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